What's the difference between Therapy, Mentoring and Coaching?
Need to frame-up these three disciplines? Perhaps my "3D Framework" can help.
Last week at this time I was on stage in Rome giving a presentation on “Leading with a Coach-Like Mindset.”
I have much to share from that preso as I tried to condense almost a year’s worth of coaching study and work into a power-packed 10-minute presentation.
It was a wonderful exercise in prioritization.
One of the more popular slides that was discussed and requested after my talk was a slide that laid out the difference between Therapy, Mentoring and Coaching. (See above).
These three disciplines are often lumped together at worst or seen as overlapping at best.
Invariably folks will say, “I had some coaching and it was like therapy.”
Or someone will say, ‘I really like coaching – especially when my coach just tells me what to do!”
As anyone who’s spent a little bit of time in the world of pure coaching knows, Therapy and Mentoring serve critical, but different purposes than Coaching.
I expressed this as simply as I could and it seemed to land well.
As you can see, my “3D Framework” (for three disciplines) lays out a simple way to understand the differences between Therapy, Mentoring and Coaching.
Allow me to expand a wee-bit and hopefully not confuse things.
Therapy is about looking back. It serves to ask “Why?” Why are you the way you are? Why do you respond to things a certain way? What from your past may be contributing to something…why?
Mentoring is advice. It’s about What and How you should do something. And it’s quite focused on right now. Mentoring shows up in phrases like, “If I were in your shoes, I would do x.” Or it manifests in the form of experience: “When I was a managing director, here’s how I would do it.”
Coaching, at best, delves into “What’s Possible.” A good coaching session may very well solve an immediate problem. But the best sessions focus on dreams, visions or goals. The conversation tries to lift up from the immediate challenge to get to an ideal place. Then we can work backwards on how to get there.
Of course, the demands of clients and colleagues may force you into a Mentoring role – and there is nothing wrong with that. Quite effective at times.
But if you can lead with a little more coaching, you may not only help people get to a better place. They will also experience tangible growth. After all, a coach-like leader doesn’t overcome the challenge for the colleague – the coach-like leader helps a colleague meet the challenge so they can solve it their own way.
I’m sure if you’re a coaching nerd, you’ll appreciate this little chart.
And if you’re a creative, manager or leader, I hope this chart helps you as well. After all, it’s built to expand your own tool kit.
I like this simple model, Rob.
One thing I find with my coaching clients is that they sometimes really want advice (mentoring), and it’s hard to stay with the “pure” coaching model.
I build this into my coaching sessions very carefully because, as coaches, we know it’s better for our clients to think things through themselves. This is the way we help them transform.
My approach is to first to ask powerful questions to help them think. If they get stuck and really want advice, then either brainstorm with them or ask permission to give them advice. I always couch it that my advice may not be relevant for them or their situation.
At the end of the day, you don’t want to give your clients a fish, you want to teach them to land a catch themselves :)
There's precious little mentoring in the ad business, let alone coaching. It's always been a sink or swim enterprise, sadly. Too many deadlines, too many opinions, too many political intrigues, too many people simply looking out for themselves. Far too many "leaders" happy to step on the heads of those under them to get another leg up. Not sure it would be effective, but a formalized mentoring program forcing execs to enter into a one-on-one buddy system with a junior might be a cool experiment.