COACH: Good afternoon, Mr President. It’s been a minute.
BIDEN: I’ve been a little busy with this whole hand-off thing.
COACH: How are you feeling about that?
BIDEN: I love it! I hate it!
COACH: Succession can be very challenging.
BIDEN: It’s like my Dad used to say, “Joey, hard things are hard.” Now, I’ve got stuff to do from now until November. But after that, I’m toast.
COACH: What do you really want?
BIDEN: Four more years! But Jill says that’s not gonna happen. She’s so smart. She’s a doctor, you know.
COACH: You mentioned four years, where do you see yourself four years from now?
BIDEN: Here’s the thing. Four years from now I see myself riding my bike at the beach. But four years after that…I..I..I see myself gettin’ the band back together.
COACH: Say more.
BIDEN: In eight years, Kamala will have had her run. Then it’s BIDEN 2032! Older. Wiser….um, and, uh…I can’t remember the last word of the slogan, but trust me, it’s pretty good.
COACH: Sir, you’ll be 90 then.
BIDEN: Mularkey! I’ll be 89! There’s a difference — and the American people know it.
COACH: Ok then, would you like to work on a 2032 plan?
BIDEN: Sure thing. But let’s have some ice cream first. You like chocolate chip? That’s my favorite.
Image: Photoleap
I feel a format: imaginary coaching sessions as a very short story.
Ha! I suspect this is pretty close to the truth.